The Space Alien Controls Air Traffic during a Government Shutdown

During the current government shutdown the Space Alien decided to help exhausted Federal Aviation Administration air traffic controllers working without pay in the control tower at a major airport.

The Space Alien, as Loyal Readers know, is an expert pilot. 

This was demonstrated earlier in these exclusive photos of the Space Alien flying right side up and upside down in a specially designed, state of the art aircraft.

These photos should confirm for all Loyal Readers the Space Alien's aeronautic expertise.*

So when the Space Alien, suitably dressed as an air traffic controller (so as not to draw undue attention) stepped into the control tower of a major airport, the exhausted air traffic controllers were delighted!

"We've been working for very long shifts." the exhausted air traffic controllers explained. "We badly need some time off!"

The Space Alien glanced at the screen and instrument panel and in seconds was totally oriented to this complex job.  

"Let me take over," said the Space Alien.  "You have worked so hard!  Go home and get some rest!"

With that, the Space Alien sat down at the console to direct flights safely in and out of the busy airport.  

As you can see, passengers continued to walk calmly through the busy airport on their way to their flights, unaware that the Space Alien would now be responsible for their safety.

So, Loyal Reader, if you are traveling today, you can be perfectly confident if the Space Alien happens to be directing your flight!

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* Source:http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2018/08/the-space-alien-joins-2018-chicago-air.html

The Space Alien Paints a Portrait

Your Editor found the Space Alien hard at work on a painting.

The Space Alien Paints a Landscape

"That's a beautiful landscape," said Your Editor.   "You obviously have a great talent!"

"Yes, I've become rather good at this," said the Space Alien modestly. "But I was so inspired by this painting I saw at the Art Institute of Chicago that I've decided to take up portraiture." 

American Gothic
by Grant Wood

"That's certainly a fine classic portrait," exclaimed Your Editor, "and you obviously have excellent taste, but to do portraiture you must have models!"

"I already have models,"said the Space Alien.  "They were thrilled when I offered to paint their portraits, and this will help their modeling careers as well!  As you can see, I'm off to an excellent start!" 

American Gothic
by the Space Alien

So, Loyal Reader, next time you visit an art museum be sure to look for the work of the Space Alien.  You will be inspired and uplifted!

We are all so very proud here at the Space Alien Gazette!

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The Space Alien Welcomes 2019

The Space Alien is celebrating a quiet New Year's Eve with a lovely chilled bottle of sparkling cranberry juice. And here's another bottle of the same beverage for you to enjoy! All of us at the insanely busy office of the Space Alien Gazette wish our Loyal Readers Joy, Success and Good Health in 2019. 

This is may be your only e-mail today not seeking a donation. 

But if you would like to support a worthy cause either now or next year, the Space Alien recommends organizations that feed the hungry, such as Chicago's Food Bank, the Greater Chicago Food Depository.  Learn more here: https://www.chicagosfoodbank.org.

See you all next year with the hard-hitting journalism you can depend on!

The Space Alien Gazette

Your Reliable Source for Alternative Facts

The Space Alien Sings Messiah and Applies for a Job

The Space Alien enjoyed a delightful evening singing in Chicago's great Do It Yourself Messiah along with Your Editor, Joan, and two dear friends, Ellie and Cyndi, and took this exclusive photograph of them for the Space Alien Gazette.

Three Happy Choristers Sing Messiah

It was lots of fun and most inspirational, and conductor Stanley Sperber thanked the Space Alien for being there to help the 1500 singers at Chicago's Harris Theatre sing their parts without too many mistakes! 

Maestro Sperber, was also well aware of the important role of the Space Alien in the composition of The Messiah (about which you, Loyal Reader, may learn at: http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2016/12/the-space-alien-hanukkah-visitor.html).   

He therefore appreciated the Space Alien's assistance with another wildly successful Chicago Do It Yourself Messiah.  http://imfchicago.org/programs/do-it-yourself-messiah/

The Space Alien Assists Maestro Sperber

But this was a stark reminder that it was time for the Space Alien to find a job.  Holidays were coming and the Space Alien wanted to give gifts and entertain, but all of this took money and the Space Alien's wallet was empty.

The Space Alien Needed a Job!

In the "Help Wanted" section of the Space Alien Gazette the Space Alien found this ad: 

"Temporary Job — Immediate Employment: Delivery skills important, must love to travel and get along with children.  Send resumé to S.Claus@NorthPole."

The Space Alien quickly polished and sent off a glowing resumé, and was immediately called in for an interview with Santa himself!

"I'm ready to do the work," said the Space Alien. "Just give me the addresses and I'll deliver these gifts at tachyonic velocities exceeding the speed of light!"

"I'm so sorry," said Santa, looking sadly at the Space Alien's glowing resumé.  "I can see that you are highly qualified for this job, but unfortunately, after some checking, I see you are imaginary!  How could I comply with state and federal regulations?  I don't even think you have a Social Security number!"

Santa Ponders the Space Alien's Resumé

"Well what about you?" retorted the Space Alien.  "I looked you up in Dun and Bradstreet and although you handle billions of dollars worth of merchandise each year no one seems to know exactly where you live or anything else about you!  And you don't even seem to have an Employer Identification Number either!  So I'll bet you are imaginary too!"

"Nonsense," said Santa.  "I live in the hearts and minds of children all over the world!  Ask any of them!  I was even in a newspaper article about this," said Santa, reaching into a battered attaché case to pull out a yellowing column from a 120 year old newspaper "so that should settle it!"*

"Ha!" retorted the Space Alien.  "I live in the hearts and minds of my Loyal Readers, not to mention my Editor!  So it looks like we've got this in common!"

Santa thought deeply for a moment before responding.  

Finally he said:  

"Well, you've made your point, so I guess you're hired!"

"Hallelujah," cried the Space Alien!  "I'll start work immediately!"

Loyal Readers, please remember that the Space Alien is new at many aspects of this job.  So if your young child receives a case of Dom Pérignon Champagne, or Grandma gets a skateboard and a pair of boxing gloves, please understand that the Space Alien is just getting into the job and should be a lot better at it by next year!

The Space Alien and the entire staff here at the insanely busy newsroom of the Space Alien Gazette would like to take this opportunity to wish all Loyal Readers a Joyous Holiday Season and Good Health and Happiness in the New Year!

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* Loyal Readers wishing to know more about this famous 1897 column in one of our competitors, the New York Sun, can read about it here: 
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yes,_Virginia,_there_is_a_Santa_Claus 
or read the full text more clearly here:
 https://www.nysun.com/editorials/yes-virginia/68502/

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The Space Alien's Hanukkah Dish

Hanukkah is right around the corner!  This year it begins at sundown on Sunday, December 2nd, and the last evening is on Sunday, December 9th. 

The Space Alien had already polished a menorah to hold the candles to be lit each night -- first one, and at last all eight --  to commemorate a miracle following the victory of Judah Maccabee and his brothers who, long years ago at this season, won the right to practice their religion.

Please read more about this at: 

http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2016/12/the-space-alien-hanukkah-visitor.html

and: 

http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-space-alien-celebrates-hanukkah.html


Today Your Editor found the Space Alien in the kitchen with a wooden chopping bowl and food chopper.  

"I see you are wearing your signature apron!"* exclaimed Your Editor. 

"Yes," answered the Space Alien,  "I like to keep myself tidy in the kitchen!"

"So what's with the chopping bowl?" she asked.  

The Space Alien looked up -- "I'll be preparing a special dish for the SECOND night of Hanukkah!   The first night I'll make latkes, those delicious fried potato pancakes, but they are so heavy that I want something lighter for the next evening, a dish I can make a day or two in advance!"

"Well it looks like you are getting ready to make chopped chicken liver," said Your Editor, "but I thought you didn't eat animals!"   

"I don't," said said the Space Alien, "but this will be a special dish, and I'll have you know IT'S NOT CHOPPED LIVER!"  

"Oh, so you are making your special dish called IT'S NOT CHOPPED LIVER!"  exclaimed Your Editor.  "Everyone here loves it, so let's share this recipe here on the pages of the Space Alien Gazette for all of our  Loyal Readers!"

So here it is, a favorite here in the busy editorial offices of the Space Alien Gazette, and we think you'll like it too!  And by the way, it's quite all right to make it in a food processor!

It's Not Chopped Liver!**

1/2 cup dried lentils

1/2 cup walnuts coarsely chopped

1 large onion coarsely chopped

1 small clove garlic minced

Sea salt and fresh ground black pepper to taste 

Optional: 1 or 2 chopped fresh jalapeño peppers (for extra heat)

Optional: 1 or 2 hard boiled egg whites chopped (these are cosmetic, to resemble fat)
Or chop in a bit of tofu for the same cosmetic effect.

Optional: About 1 tsp. chicken bullion powder or granules (instead of optional salt)  Your Editor likes this!

Cook lentils in 2 cups of water until soft (about 20 minutes) and drain.

Sauté the onions and garlic (and, if using, jalapeños) in a little oil or water. 

Process the lentils, onions, garlic and walnuts in a food processor (and if using these, bullion powder or granules and/or jalapeños) to desired consistency.  (The Space Alien and Your Editor both like it a little coarse and grainy to look like chopped liver).  

Add the cooked egg whites if you are using them and process minimally; they should look like bits of fat!

Add sea salt (optional) and fresh ground black pepper to taste -- the Space Alien loves pepper!

(Your Editor recommends an electric food processor.  The Space Alien finds this machine scary and does it the old fashioned way, which Your Editor does not recommend.)  

You can make this a day or two before serving and it's even better the next day!

When ready to serve, press into a bowl and turn onto a platter; it looks nice on a large lettuce leaf!

(The Space Alien likes to decorate with strips of red and yellow sweet pepper, or slices of pimento stuffed olives, or sometimes just makes an interesting pattern with a fork!)

Surround with crackers.   Your Editor's favorite store-bought ones are Mary's Gone Crackers -- they come in many flavors, all whole grain and gluten free. 

This is great on corn chips too, stuffed in celery or spread on carrot chips or slices of cucumber!   

Or make hearty sandwiches on rye bread with lettuce, sliced tomato, mustard and onion.  

Made too much?  Freeze some to enjoy later!

Happy Hanukkah Everyone!

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* See the Space Alien Signature Apron here:
https://www.cafepress.com/sagbazaar.88916745
The Space Alien says this sturdy apron with its large pockets will keep you tidy in the kitchen too!  
Like all Space Alien gear from Cafe Press, profits go to the Greater Chicago Food Depository to feed the hungry!

(If you don't need an apron you can still donate to the Greater Chicago Food Depository at  https://www.chicagosfoodbank.org)    

**NOTE:  For this recipe your editor is indebted to her friend Daila Shefner who found it many years ago in an American Heart Association cookbook.  We've made small changes to make it even more oil-free, made the "cosmetic" egg white optional, and added a few other options.  This is a forgiving recipe so feel free to make your own changes.   It goes so fast the Space Alien usually doubles the recipe!

The Space Alien's Thanksgiving Soup

The Space Alien, carrying a huge soup tureen, arrived at the Space Alien Gazette's gleaming test kitchen, where preparations were underway for a gala Thanksgiving dinner.   

"I just returned from a special intergalactic mission," said the Space Alien, and I did not have much time to prepare.  But my friend Carol D'Anca sent me her recipe for a delicious butternut squash soup! I know everyone will love it! Butternut squash is one of my favorites!"

https://www.foodnotmeds.com/roasted-butternut-squash-soup/

"I love butternut squash too," said your editor, dipping a clean spoon in for a taste, "and this soup is SO delicious!  It must have taken you HOURS!"  

"No," answered the Space Alien, "it was really quick and easy! And all of Carol D'Anca's recipes are healthful too. You can find lots of her recipes and other valuable information here:  https://www.foodnotmeds.com."

"Well it's delicious and everyone will love it!" said Your Editor carrying the tureen to the already groaning table.

And everyone did!!

All of us here in the busy editorial offices of the Space Alien Gazette wish our loyal readers a healthy and happy Thanksgiving!

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Loyal Readers will also enjoy Carol D'Anca's book "Real Food for Healthy People."   It's full of recipes that are easy, delicious and, best of all, healthful!  Scroll all the way down for a link to it or find it directly at www.Amazon.com or www.barnesandnoble.com.

Newer readers may enjoy these earlier Thanksgiving Posts:

2016: http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2016/11/the-space-alien-observes-thanksgiving.html

2017: http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-space-aliens-thanksgiving-feast.html

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The Space Alien Dances with the Joffrey Ballet

Your Editor found the Space Alien in the living room wearing electric blue tights and doing barre exercises at a towel rack placed in front of a large mirror.

(Unfortunately no camera was handy to record this scene so Loyal Readers will simply have to imagine it for themselves. )

"Hallowe'en is almost here," said Your Editor.  "Have you thought about your costume this year?"

The Space Alien completed a graceful plié and turned to Your Editor.  

"I've had no time for that," said the Space Alien.  "I've been asked to understudy for a ballerina at the famous Joffrey Ballet in Chicago -- she sprained her little toe and may not be able to dance -- so I only have a short time to learn her part in Swan Lake."  

"Well, that's certainly exciting and a tribute to your talent," said Your Editor, "but you are post-gender, so how will you handle this traditionally female role?"

"I practiced very hard to be a believable swan," answered the Space Alien," and as you can see by this poster they made in case I'm called to perform, I more than succeeded!" 

"You certainly are believable in the role" said Your Editor, "but will you be sad if the regular dancer recovers and you are not called?"

"I'll be a little disappointed," said the Space Alien, "but the important thing is the ballet itself!  I am thrilled to contribute to my art in any way, and there will be other opportunities I am sure!" 

"Your devotion is commendable," said Your Editor, "and maybe you can wear your lovely tutu to our Space Alien Gazette Hallowe'en party!"

"Say, that's a great idea," said the Space Alien, executing a graceful tour jeté across the room.   

So, Loyal Reader,  if you plan to attend the final Joffrey Ballet production of Swan Lake you may have a chance to experience the thrill of watching the Space Alien in the role of the graceful Swan!  

Otherwise, here is the poster with the regular performer -- and we are sure you would enjoy that performance as well!

Happy Hallowe'en!!!

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Note: A Loyal Reader reminds us that the Space Alien, no newcomer to classical ballet, played a crucial role last December involving reindeer dancing in the Joffrey Ballet's Nutcracker:  

http://spacealiengazette.blogspot.com/2017/12/the-space-alien-helps-santa.html

The Space Alien Marches Again with the Women

The Space Alien was thrilled to march in the second Chicago Women's March on Saturday, October 13, 2018.  The weather was perfect and early reports indicated this March would be even larger than the one last year. 

Unfortunately Your Editor's broken bones were still rattling around loose, so she was not able to march this year.  But the Space Alien, a fearless and industrious reporter, covered this for the Space Alien Gazette.  

The Women's March to the Polls, not only encouraged women to get out the vote this year, but also facilitated early voting for those wishing to do so.    

From a convenient perch atop Chicago's Roosevelt University in the historic Auditorium Theatre Building, the Space Alien could Watch the marchers.    

The Space Alien Watches from atop the
Auditorium Theatre Building

(The historic Auditorium Theatre, designed by Louis Sullivan and Dankmar Adler over 125 years ago is one of the Space Alien's favorite places!)

The Space Alien Enjoys a Performance at the Auditorium Theatre

But today, seeing how many marchers were dressed for the occasion, the Space Alien went to the nearby "Voter Village, " quickly found a vendor with perfect outfitting for the March, and sent this exclusive selfie back to Your Editor.

The Space Alien Outfitted for the Womens March to the Polls

"How do you like my outfit?" asked the Space Alien, stopping in at Your Editor's house after the March.  "This tote bag is so handy for all my marching gear!  And the t-shirt and cap are simply ME!"

"Well, I guess since you are imaginary you won't be voting any time soon, so whenever you do it will be your first time," answered Your Editor, still somewhat glum about missing the March. 

"I know," said the Space Alien sadly.  "I'm not a citizen and I'm not even real -- but even if I'm imaginary I still have hopes and dreams!" 

"You're right," agreed Your Editor.  "I'm sad because I couldn't march today, and this had been among my hopes and dreams.  But now I need to move on and do what I can to get out the vote!"

The Space Alien nodded sadly and then brightened --- "Look at my pictures!  There were SO many people!  Maybe even more than last year!   I'm glad I went, and I marched twice as hard --  for you!'

"Thank you," said your Editor.  "Your being there was almost like being there myself!  So now let's have a look at your photos!" 

Chicago Women's March 2018 in Grant Park

Chicago Women's March 2018 at the 
Chicago Civic Center

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