Friday, March 22, 2019

The Space Alien Considers a Move

Your Editor was astonished to see the Space Alien at her front door carrying a heavy rucksack and lots of camping gear.  

"Where are you off to now?" she asked.

"I'm terribly concerned about how climate change will affect us here on Earth, so I'm checking out another place to live, another planet or even another galaxy," said the Space Alien, setting down the rucksack and the tent, along with a clattering cascade of camp cooking utensils.

"But why? I thought you liked it here!" 

"Well, Earth was very nice but it may soon be unlivable," said the Space Alien.  You know how frightened I get in tornados and floods and big storms, and all this freakish weather has been driving me crazy; and see this article about how even tropical diseases are heading towards the Arctic!"

"It makes me itch just thinking about it!" continued the Space Alien. 

"I think you are making this up!" said Your Editor.

"No!" cried the Space Alien.  "The U. S. Environmental Protection Agency even has a website about climate change!  You should read it sometime!"

"Well, I'm very busy now," answered Your Editor, "and this may just be a hoax!"

"But what if it isn't?" said the Space Alien.  "You humans don't seem to be doing a think about this, so I'm checking out a more livable home!"

"But what about me?" cried Your Editor. 

"Oh, I'll send you a post card now and then! I know you can't travel at tachyonic velocities exceeding the speed of light the way I do, so you'll just have to get along as best you can!"  

With that, the Space Alien reached into the rucksack and pulled out a two-year-old issue of the Space Alien Gazette.  

"See!  We even addressed this years ago, but no one did anything about it!"  

And, Loyal Reader, you may recall this: 

The Space Alien reached into the rucksack again and pulled out more documents.

"Just look at this report predicting the mass social disturbance likely to accompany these destructive storms!  Floods, famines, droughts, economic disruptions, mass migrations and other cataclysmic events are likely to occur with increasing frequency!"  The Space Alien displayed an overview with a link to this report:

And then the Space Alien followed this to the introduction and link to a thirty page report explaining the concept of "deep adaptation" to the cataclysmic events predicted in the wake of climate change:

And here, Loyal Reader, if you are having difficulty finding this, is the direct link to that 30 page report entitled Deep Adaptation, A Map for Navigating Climate Tragedy:

Your Editor looked over these documents and somberly considered their content before she spoke: "This is important; I hope our Loyal Readers will think about this."

The Space Alien turned to leave, but then stopped to consider life without kind and interesting human friends, and set the heavy rucksack back on the ground.

"I can't leave now!  I want to be here to help you no matter what, but now we have a job to do!"

"We certainly do!" said Your Editor.

I'll tell you what," said the Space Alien, "if you will write a letter to each presidential candidate telling them you will not support them unless they pledge to help stop climate change, I'll deliver them right to their desks!  And then let's think of other ways to protect the future of our beautiful planet!"  

And they did!