The Space Alien Takes a Roller Coaster Ride in the Interests of Good Health |
Located on a peninsula jutting into Lake Erie, Cedar Point boasts seventeen roller coasters, including some of the largest in the world. People come from miles around to experience these thrilling rides, and the Space Alien was thrilled to try them all.
The Space Alien tried to entertain other tourists on the steep downslides and corkscrews by telling jokes and reciting limericks. This turned out to be somewhat frustrating as the other tourists, screaming in terror, paid no attention to the Space Alien's efforts to entertain them. But this did little to dampen the Space Alien's overall enjoyment!
Here are some photographs your editor (who stayed on the ground) took of the Space Alien aboard the roller coasters at Cedar Point:
Later the Space Alien said that while the rides were fun and the other tourists (even the ones who threw up) were pleasant, this experience was fairly tame and did not come close to the tachyonic velocities exceeding the speed of light at which the Space Alien normally travels. The Space Alien wondered whether polishing the tracks a bit might help.
Your Editor and the Space Alien agreed on one thing: nothing can match the pure aesthetic experience of riding the Ferris Wheel at Navy Pier in Chicago.