Space Alien Gazette

Monday, August 3, 2020

The Space Alien Makes a Big Move

One of many recent executive decisions the Space Alien made was to move internet hosting from Jacksonville, Florida to Mountain View, California, nearly 3,000 miles away!  

Since the Space Alien normally travels at tachyonic velocities exceeding the speed of light, there was concern that bringing needed information to California in this manner could totally vaporize these valuable files!     

Many commercial airlines had cut back on flights because of COVID-19, and the Space Alien has encountered difficulties with commercial airlines (mainly involving disputes over bags of peanuts).   

So the Space Alien decided to take a leisurely drive to the new headquarters.  
Hopefully not too many valuable files will be lost in this move, and the Space Alien looks forward to many more years of producing the very highest quality journalism for Loyal Readers of the incomparable Space Alien Gazette!  

Friday, July 3, 2020

The Space Alien Celebrates Independence Day in the Time of COVID-19

Your Editor encountered the Space Alien viewing past issues of the Space Alien Gazette.

"Look how proudly I marched on July 4th last year!" cried the Space Alien.  "I beat the drum in a Spirit of '76 reenactment so all the marchers could keep in step!"

"And this July marks the completion of our fourth year of online publication of the Space Alien Gazette," added the Space Alien. "I think we should have a big party to celebrate that as well!"

"But you know we can't have a big party now because of COVID-19," said Your Editor.

"So what shall I do instead on July 4th?" cried the Space Alien.

Your Editor paused before answering.

"Do you know what the Fourth of July is all about?" she asked.

"I'm not sure," answered the Space Alien. 
"Maybe the invention of firecrackers?"

"Not at all," said your Editor.  "Just look at this!" she continued, taking a framed reproduction down from the wall.  

"This document, written over 200 years ago and signed on July 4, 1776, declared the independence of the United States of America from the British Empire," she explained.

And you may read it here:

The Space Alien looked over this document thoughtfully, and then read these words aloud:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness." 

"These are very important words!" said the Space Alien.  "I am going to spend the rest of the day studying them and thinking about their meaning!" 

"That's a good idea," agreed Your Editor.  "I'll join you -- we'll do this together!  And then we'll act to assure that our government today will actually live up to these words with fairness for all!"
This issue of the Space Alien Gazette is lovingly dedicated to the memory of my dear Uncle Al who reminded us each year to re-read the Declaration of Independence on the Fourth of July. 

Friday, June 5, 2020

The Space Alien Shows Up for Justice

Your Editor came upon the Space Alien carrying a small case neatly packed with containers of food.

"Where are you going?"  She asked. 

"I don't know," answered the Space Alien, "but I'm leaving here and I may never come back!"

"What?" cried Your Editor.  "But why?"

"Just look at this picture!" cried the Space Alien pulling out a cell phone.  "I took it the other day!"     

"This is a land of cruel and murderous people who torture and kill people who don't look like them, or who don't think like them!  Even some who promise to serve and protect people commit murder as if it were a commonplace event!   How can I stay in a place like this?  I'm leaving!"

Your Editor was silent.  For a moment she considered asking the Space Alien to take her along, to take her far from a place where small children could sing about "crowning good with brotherhood" while their elders did exactly the opposite.  An image of another woman came into her mind.  
Then she spoke:  "Space Alien, please stay!  You are needed here!  I need you here!  We have work to do!  We may not finish this work in my lifetime, but we still need to do the work!"   

"Just look!" she continued.  "There are lots of good people!  They are marching right now and we can join them!" 

"More and more will join us!   This is where change can start!  This is not the time to leave!  This is the time to remember why we are here and to take back our country for justice!"

And together, with millions of others, they did!

Never Forgotten!
For more information, see:

Thursday, June 4, 2020

The Space Alien Responds to a Wear a Mask Contest

[Editors Note: This post, intended for early June, 2020, was not sent to subscribers, as the murder of George Floyd at the hands of Minneapolis Police officers rightfully preempted it.  It may be sent to e-mail subscribers at some future date, but for now it is only here on the website.] 
In a campaign to stop the spread of COVID-19, New York  Governor Andrew Cuomo recently sponsored a "Wear a Mask" contest to produce a Public Service Announcement (PSA).     

Hundreds of people submitted entries, and a reported half-million voted!   

On May 26, 2020, Governor Cuomo announced a tie for winner, and both will be used in PSA's.

You may view the top entries here: 
While immune to the terrible COVID-19 virus, the Space Alien nevertheless wears a mask to set a good example for human friends and decided to write a poem for Governor Cuomo's contest.

Unfortunately the deadline for entries had already passed, but the Space Alien wrote a poem anyway and put on a brand new mask to celebrate.    
Here's the poem the Space Alien wrote and recited as a rap wearing the brand-new mask!  

You don't have to ask,
I'll still Wear a Mask!
At home or in space,
I'll cover my face!
Our friends will admire us,
And not catch this virus!
It's fashionable too!
And shows I love you!

The Space Alien is sure this would have won a prize in Governor Cuomo's contest and believes Loyal Readers would agree!  

A note from Your Editor:
Loyal Reader, if the COVID-19 situation is still with us as you read this, please follow the Space Alien's lead and protect those around you by wearing a mask!  

This post is repeated at Your Editor's COVID-19 blog: 

And to read more about the importance of wearing a mask -- especially to protect others -- see


Sunday, May 10, 2020

The Space Alien Observes Mothers Day, 2020

Mother's Day is special for the Space Alien, who doesn't recall having a mother but in general thinks mothers are wonderful and sometimes sees Your Editor in that role.  

Last year the Space Alien had taken Your Editor out for a lovely dinner and given her a beautiful framed self-portrait.

But this year restaurants were closed, and the Space Alien's official photographer was on assignment for major news outlets taking pictures of those showoff but oh-so-dangerous Corona Viruses! 

"I could visit her," thought the Space Alien.  "I'm imaginary so it wouldn't really be breaking her building's COVID-19 rules against visitors."

"But that doesn't seem fair; and how would I get one of my special cakes to her if I couldn't deliver it myself?"

"I think I'll give her a call on Mother's Day," concluded the Space Alien, getting out an old but serviceable cell phone. 

"She likes to talk a lot," thought the Space Alien.  
"Sometimes she can be a little repetitive and even boring but that's ok!"  

The Space Alien and the entire staff of the Space Alien Gazette wish you and yours a Happy, Healthy and SAFE Mother's Day!  

Monday, April 27, 2020

The Space Alien Takes Bad COVID-19 Advice

The Space Alien showed up at Your Editor's house ready to work on the next issue of the Space Alien Gazette.  

Your Editor was shocked by the Space Alien's appearance.  
"What happened to you?" she cried.  "You've become quite pale!"

"I did what the President told us to do for COVID-19," answered the Space Alien.  "He told us to inject bleach!  So I figured drinking it would be just as good.  The President also talked about using something called 'hydroxychloroquine.'  I thought this was what he meant!" 

"Oh no!" cried Your Editor!  "That could make you terribly sick!

"Don't worry," said the Space Alien.  "You know I'm imaginary so I'll be ok!"

"Well," replied Your Editor, "I only hope that some Loyal Reader won't try it and be terribly injured!" 

"You're right!" agreed the Space Alien, quickly returning to normal.  "I won't do that again!  Now I'll just wash up!"  

Dear Loyal Readers -- You are NOT the Space Alien so PLEASE do not do ANY of these things! 
(Just wash your hands and, if you wish, use hand sanitizer on your hands!)   


Monday, April 6, 2020

The Space Alien and Queen Elizabeth II During the COVID-19 Crisis

The Space Alien was a trusted confidant of Queen Elizabeth I during the 16th Century. 

More recently, the Space Alien had the ear of British royalty when Queen Elizabeth II was a Royal Princess and, later, a beautiful young Queen!

But the Space Alien does not just lounge around Buckingham Palace, and never hesitates to volunteer wherever needed.

When one of the Palace Guards recently stubbed his toe and could not march, the Space Alien immediately donned the classic uniform and marched with military precision in the ceremonial Changing of the Guard.  

The absent Guard soon felt better and thanked the Space Alien for filling in!  

So it was no surprise that the Space Alien was right beside Queen Elizabeth this week when she exhorted the nation to be brave in the face of COVID-19, and to follow the advice of doctors to stay home and do whatever else might be needed to stay healthy during this scourge!    

Here is the Queen's Address of April 5, 2020: 

(We hope this will still be online!)

Be sure to turn on your computer speakers as well as the speaker icons at the lower left of the TV screen on this link to listen!

And Stay Well! 

In the Mailbag!

This issue of the Space Alien Gazette prompted an unusual number of comments from Loyal Readers.  

Could this be that because during the COVID-19 crisis, many Loyal Readers are at home with nothing but time on their hands?

A few of these comments are summarized here: 

1. Why is the U.K. (United Kingdom) not renamed the U.Q. (United Queendom):  A really good question.  Perhaps in happier, healthier times the Space Alien will take this up with the proper officials who will probably be pleased to spend some time pondering this!

2. From a Loyal Reader who is also a health care professional, as well as several other Loyal Readers:  Why isn't the Space Alien practicing Social Distancing during this time of COVID-19?  

This is a very good question and Your Editor was remiss in not explaining.  Happily, the Space Alien is blessed with a uniquely endowed immune system and neither transmits nor is subject to communicable diseases.  

This is why you can get as close as you wish to your computer, tablet or cell phone to read the Space Alien Gazette in perfect safety!  (Unless you are driving your car!)

3. Another Loyal Reader wrote to say that the Space Alien should have been wearing a mask to set a good example.  Your Editor cannot argue with this logic and neither can the Space Alien.  So the Space Alien is now wearing a mask -- it doesn't fit perfectly but we hope it will set a suitable example to remind Loyal Readers to wear theirs! 

The Space Alien Sets a Good Example!
Just be sure YOUR mask fits better!


Saturday, March 14, 2020

The Space Alien Visits the Museum of Contemporary Art

Because of the outbreak of the Corona virus (COVID-19), a brunch with friends at Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art (MCA) to which Your Editor had been invited had to be cancelled.  

But the Space Alien, being a creature of fantasy, and whose passion is modern art, decided to make a fantasy visit to this important museum.     

Loyal Readers may recall reading about the Space Alien's earlier visit to Chicago's Art Institute.  
So this trip to yet another leading art museum was very special for the Space Alien. 

First the Space Alien enjoyed a lovely fantasy meal with fantasy friends at MCA's exquisite Marisol Restaurant. 
Next, adequately nourished, the Space Alien toured some of the famous artistic works in the quiet galleries. 

The Space Alien admired a portrait of an old friend.  
"It's a perfect likeness!" exclaimed the Space Alien.

Visitors,  young and old, listened attentively as the Space Alien helped the MCA staff by leading a fantasy guided tour (since real people would never stand in such close proximity given the current public health situation!). 

At the Museum Store the Space Alien picked up a can of soup.  "I'm not sure why they are selling soup here, or why someone left a candle in it" said the Space Alien, "but it will be nice to have a can of soup in my pantry to enjoy some cold winter night!"

"And one more thing!" thought the Space Alien placing some purchases on the checkout counter.
"This is my gift for every single one of my Loyal Readers!"  
Hopefully the day will not be distant when Loyal Readers can safely enjoy this and so much more at Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art.   More information is here:     
Note: Now that Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art is closed, a Loyal Reader responded with this URL with addresses for online tours of some great art museums all over the world!  The Space Alien plans to digitally visit them all!

Note: On March 20, 2020, Your Editor received news from the Art Institute of Chicago (now closed) about their new "Interactive Features" which you may enjoy online!

Note: Added March 23, 2020, another sign of the times from the Art Institute of Chicago: